15 Facts About Surrogacy for Intended Parents: The Definitive Guide

15 Facts About Surrogacy for Intended Parents

Surrogacy has become an increasingly popular option for individuals and couples struggling with infertility or those unable to carry out a pregnancy themselves. However, navigating the complex world of surrogacy can be overwhelming. This comprehensive guide aims to provide intended parents with crucial information about the surrogacy process, addressing common concerns and misconceptions.

Summary Table: 15 Essential Facts About Surrogacy

PointKey Information
1. Types of SurrogacyGestational (most common) and Traditional
2. Legal ConsiderationsSurrogacy contracts, parentage orders, varying laws by jurisdiction
3. Worldwide LegalityVaries greatly; some countries allow commercial surrogacy, others only altruistic, some ban it entirely
4. Surrogacy AgenciesProvide screening, matching, coordination, and support services
5. Surrogate QualificationsTypically 21-40 years old, good health, prior uncomplicated pregnancy
6. CostsAverage $77,000 – $180,000+ in the US; varies internationally
7. Surrogate MotivationsOften altruistic, not primarily financial
8. Surrogates Keeping BabyExtremely rare, especially in gestational surrogacy
9. Bonding with BabyGenetic connection and early care more important than pregnancy for bonding
10. Choosing a SurrogateOptions: agency-matched, independent, or known surrogate
11. Age ConsiderationsNo strict upper limit for intended parents; surrogates typically 21-40
12. Multiple Surrogacy JourneysMany surrogates carry more than once; usually limited to 3-4 journeys
13. Screening ProcessesComprehensive medical, psychological, and background checks for all parties
14. Emotional JourneyCan be complex; professional support often beneficial
15. Social PerceptionsIncreasing acceptance, but some may still face judgment

More Resources to Read:

Infertility Treatment and Surrogacy Process

9 Factors To Improve IVF Pregnancy Rate

International Surrogacy Options Worldwide

Surrogacy Guide for Surrogate Mothers

Facts About Surrogacy for Intended Parents

Let’s discuss the facts about surrogacy for intended parents as during the initial phase of their surrogacy Research they come across many myths, that need to be clarified so that they can make an informed decision. 

1. Types of Surrogacy

There are two primary types of surrogacy arrangements:

Gestational Surrogacy

  • The surrogate (also called a gestational carrier) carries an embryo created from the intended parents’ or donors’ genetic material.
  • The surrogate has no genetic connection to the baby.
  • This is the most common form of surrogacy today.

Traditional Surrogacy

  • The surrogate’s own egg is used, making her the biological mother of the child.
  • Sperm from the intended father or a donor is used for fertilization.
  • This type is less common due to legal and emotional complexities.

Key Takeaway: Gestational surrogacy is generally preferred as it minimizes legal complications and emotional attachments.

Surrogate Mother

2. Legal Considerations

Surrogacy laws vary widely across different jurisdictions. Key legal aspects include:

  • Surrogacy contracts: These legally binding agreements outline the rights and responsibilities of all parties involved.
  • Parentage orders: Legal documents establishing the intended parents as the child’s legal parents.
  • International surrogacy laws: Regulations differ significantly between countries, affecting citizenship and parental rights.

Important: Always work with an experienced surrogacy attorney familiar with the laws in your jurisdiction.

3. Surrogacy Legality Worldwide

Surrogacy laws vary greatly around the world:

Country/RegionSurrogacy Status
United StatesVaries by state; some states are surrogacy-friendly, others prohibit it
CanadaAltruistic surrogacy is legal; commercial surrogacy is prohibited
UKAltruistic surrogacy is legal; commercial surrogacy is prohibited
AustraliaAltruistic surrogacy is legal; commercial surrogacy is prohibited
IndiaCommercial surrogacy banned; altruistic surrogacy allowed for Indian citizens
UkraineCommercial surrogacy is legal for heterosexual married couples

Note: Laws are subject to change. Always verify current regulations with a legal professional.

4. The Role of Surrogacy Agencies

Working with a reputable surrogacy agency can provide numerous benefits:

  • Surrogate screening and matching
  • Coordination of medical and legal processes
  • Emotional support and counseling
  • Financial management

While agencies add to the overall cost, they can help avoid potential pitfalls and streamline the surrogacy journey.

Surrogacy Experts

5. Surrogate Qualifications

Typical requirements for surrogate mothers include:

  • Age: Usually between 21-40 years old
  • Health: Good physical and mental health
  • Obstetric history: Has given birth to at least one child without complications
  • Lifestyle: Non-smoker, no drug use, limited alcohol consumption
  • Financial stability: Not dependent on compensation as primary income

These criteria help ensure the best possible outcomes for both the surrogate and the baby.

6. The Myth of Affordability

While surrogacy is often associated with celebrities and wealthy individuals, it’s becoming more accessible to a broader range of intended parents. However, it remains a significant financial investment.

Average costs for surrogacy in the United States:

Expense CategoryEstimated Cost Range
Agency Fees$15,000 – $30,000
Surrogate Compensation$30,000 – $60,000
Medical Expenses$20,000 – $60,000
Legal Fees$7,000 – $15,000
Misc. Expenses$5,000 – $15,000
Total$77,000 – $180,000+

Cost-saving tips: Consider international surrogacy in surrogacy-friendly countries or explore financing options specifically designed for fertility treatments.

7. Surrogate Motivations

Contrary to popular belief, financial compensation is often not the primary motivation for surrogates. Common reasons include:

  • Desire to help others experience parenthood
  • Enjoyment of pregnancy and childbirth
  • Sense of fulfillment and personal accomplishment
  • Appreciation for their own family and wish to give that joy to others

Understanding these motivations can help intended parents build a more meaningful relationship with their surrogate.

8. The Myth of Surrogates Keeping the Baby

One of the most common fears among intended parents is that the surrogate might change her mind and want to keep the baby. In reality, this is extremely rare, especially in gestational surrogacy arrangements. Factors that minimize this risk include:

  • Thorough psychological screening of surrogates
  • Legal contracts clearly outlining parental rights
  • Lack of genetic connection in gestational surrogacy
  • Surrogates’ understanding and commitment to the process

9. Bonding with Your Baby

Many intended parents worry about bonding with a child they didn’t carry. However, research shows that genetic connection and early bonding experiences are more significant factors in parent-child attachment than pregnancy itself. Ways to promote bonding include:

  • Attending prenatal appointments and ultrasounds
  • Talking or singing to the baby through the surrogate’s belly
  • Being present for the birth
  • Immediate skin-to-skin contact after birth
  • Engaging in feeding, changing, and other care activities from the start

10. Choosing a Surrogate

Intended parents have several options when selecting a surrogate:

  1. Agency-matched surrogates: Professionally screened and supported throughout the process.
  2. Independent surrogates: Found through personal networks or online communities.
  3. Friend or family member: Can reduce costs but may complicate relationships.

Each option has pros and cons, and the best choice depends on individual circumstances and comfort levels.

11. Age Considerations for Surrogacy

While there’s no strict upper age limit for intended parents pursuing surrogacy, some factors to consider include:

  • Egg quality declines with age, potentially necessitating egg donation for older intended mothers.
  • Some clinics and agencies have age limits for intended parents.
  • Parenting energy levels and long-term health considerations.

For surrogates, the ideal age range is typically 21-40, balancing maturity with optimal health for pregnancy.

What Is Surrogacy Meaning: A Comprehensive Guide

12. Multiple Surrogacy Journeys

Many surrogates choose to carry more than once. Benefits of working with an experienced surrogate include:

  • Proven track record of successful pregnancies and births
  • Familiarity with the emotional and physical demands of surrogacy
  • Established relationships with medical providers and agencies

Most agencies limit surrogates to 3-4 journeys to protect their health and well-being.

13. Comprehensive Screening Processes

Both surrogates and intended parents undergo extensive screening, including:

  • Medical evaluations
  • Psychological assessments
  • Background checks
  • Financial stability verification

This thorough process helps ensure the best possible outcomes for all parties involved.

14. The Emotional Journey of Surrogacy

Surrogacy can be an emotional rollercoaster for all involved. Common experiences include:

  • Excitement and anticipation
  • Anxiety about the pregnancy and legal process
  • Grief over infertility or inability to carry a pregnancy
  • Joy and gratitude for the surrogate’s gift

Professional counseling and support groups can be invaluable resources throughout the journey.

15. Navigating Social Perceptions

While surrogacy is becoming more accepted, intended parents may still face judgment or misunderstanding from others. Strategies for handling these situations include:

  • Educating others about surrogacy
  • Setting boundaries about personal information
  • Connecting with other surrogacy families for support
  • Focusing on the joy of building your family, regardless of others’ opinions

Remember, your journey to parenthood is unique and valuable, regardless of the path you choose.

More Resources to Read:

How much does Surrogacy Cost

Surrogacy Guide for Surrogate Mothers

Surrogacy Guide for Intended Parents

How does the surrogacy process work

Conclusion

Surrogacy offers a path to parenthood for many who might otherwise be unable to have children. While the process can be complex and challenging, understanding these key aspects can help intended parents navigate their surrogacy journey with confidence and clarity. Always work with reputable professionals and don’t hesitate to seek support throughout the process.

For more information on surrogacy, IVF, and egg donation services worldwide, visit IVF Conceptions. We offer free, legally secure, and affordable surrogacy consulting services to help you on your path to parenthood.

If you’d like to learn more about IVF, Egg Donation, or surrogacy services globally, check out the rest of our website at  Complete Surrogacy Agency. We offer legally secure and affordable surrogacy consulting services for FREE.

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Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

Q: How much does surrogacy typically cost? 

A: In the United States, surrogacy can cost between $77,000 and $180,000+, depending on various factors such as location, medical expenses, and surrogate compensation.

Q: How long does the surrogacy process usually take? 

A: The entire process, from initial consultation to birth, typically takes 15-24 months, though this can vary based on individual circumstances.

Q: Can same-sex couples pursue surrogacy? 

A: Yes, many countries and states allow same-sex couples to pursue surrogacy. However, laws vary, so it’s important to check regulations in your specific location.

Q: What’s the difference between traditional and gestational surrogacy? 

A: In traditional surrogacy, the surrogate’s own egg is used, making her the biological mother. In gestational surrogacy, the embryo is created using the intended parents’ or donors’ genetic material, so the surrogate has no genetic link to the baby.

Q: Can a surrogate decide to keep the baby? 

A: This is extremely rare, especially in gestational surrogacy. Proper screening, counseling, and legal agreements help prevent this scenario.

Q: Do I need to work with a surrogacy agency? 

A: While not mandatory, agencies can provide valuable support, screening, and coordination services. Many intended parents find agencies helpful in navigating the complex surrogacy process.

Q: Is surrogacy legal everywhere? 

A: No, surrogacy laws vary widely between countries and even between states within countries. It’s crucial to understand the legal landscape in your jurisdiction.

Q: Can I choose my own surrogate? 

A: Yes, you can choose to work with a friend, family member, or independently found surrogate. However, many intended parents opt for agency-matched surrogates who have been professionally screened.

Q: Will I be able to bond with a baby born via surrogacy? 

A: Yes, research shows that genetic connection and early caregiving experiences are more significant for bonding than pregnancy itself. Many strategies can help intended parents bond with their baby throughout the process.

Q: Are there age limits for surrogacy? 

A: For surrogates, the typical age range is 21-40. For intended parents, there’s no strict upper limit, but some clinics and agencies may have age restrictions, and egg quality declines with age.

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Neelam Chhagani, MA (Counselling Psychology), PGD (Mental Health), and Holistic Infertility and Third-Party Reproduction Consultant.

Member of European Fertility Society, Best Surrogacy Blogger of 2020, with 300 dedicated blogs and top contributor on Quora for Surrogacy.

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I was introduced to Neelam by a friend who worked with Neelam for surrogacy. Neelam is absolutely wonderful. I am a single male and the journey to fatherhood is not that easy. Neelam connected me to a program ideal for my circumstances. She was with me throughout the pregnancy providing advice and guidance along the way. I am so grateful I found her and am thrilled today that I have a beautiful daughter. I highly recommend Neelam to anyone who is on a journey to become a parent. Having a child has changed my world for the better. I wish others success with their own journey and recommend you connect with Neelam to find a path that is best for you.

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Neelam is empathic and an awesome professional. She’s always available and eager to response to clients calls. She followed our process the way. Definitely recommend.

J&C (UK)

This whole journey has been absolutely wonderful. And I have such a beautiful daughter today. I have such an amazing army of family and friends surrounding me. She’s brought so much joy to everyone Especially me. I’m grateful that we moved forward I don’t know what I would do without her. So please let Mark now we made the right decision and yes I’m thinking about a second journey. I think it’s important to raise a child with a sibling. So two children seems like the right thing. Will make a final decision in the next 3 to 4 months.

S (USA)

Thank you so much for your handholding and for connecting me with everything. I am so grateful for the role that you’ve played. I’m the happiest father alive. Thank you so much for your guidance along the way. She’s adorable and I’m all gushy in love!!!

SE (USA)

Hoping to have wonder babies, we initiated the process with Neelam at IVF Conceptions. Her warm concerns and dedicated helps drive this process moving through frustrated change of surrogacy policy in India. Finally, the surrogacy was smoothly transferred to Russia and now, we saw our baby growing already. We greatly thank Neelam, who sincerely helped us to achieve our baby dream. There is no doubt that both IVF conceptions and IVF Sunrise provided excellent surrogacy service with transparent fund transactions.

PH (USA)

We are so glad to inform about arrival of twins for our single Intended Parent.. This was his first attempt with Asian egg donor and he was successful in first round of embryos transfer with twins. The pregnancy term was eventless and during routine visit on 34 weeks- doctor decided to CS as surrogate was 4 cm dilated. Babies are so cute and adorable and surrogate- doing well. It goes without saying J L is very delighted and busy dad!!!

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